9IPL and Durga: Supporting Our Team with Strength and Respect

The living room has divided itself into two cheerful camps. One friend supports our team; another has arrived wearing the other team's colours. Tea is passed around, a child asks who we want to win, and the match is about to begin. In our 9IPL reflection at Ishta Mel, we remember Durga and consider the strength of a respectful spectator. We can care deeply about our team while helping this shared afternoon remain enjoyable for people whose loyalties differ from ours.

The room can hold two loyalties

Supporting a team gives a contest personal meaning. We recognise its familiar players, remember earlier performances and feel the excitement of hoping together. Another person may have an equally meaningful connection with the opposing side. Understanding this does not require us to reduce our own enthusiasm. It allows us to see that the person across the room belongs in the gathering as fully as we do.

Before the match gathers pace, we can make that welcome ordinary and visible. Everyone should have a comfortable place to watch and room to respond. We can ask what the other supporter enjoys about their team, with genuine interest in the answer. A little knowledge of their attachment can make it harder to treat them later as merely a target for our frustration.

Praise gives enthusiasm a direction

Our words can put energy into what we admire. We can celebrate a well-judged effort, good coordination or a player recovering composure after a difficult moment. Specific praise makes our support richer because it asks us to notice the game. It also gives us something to say beyond repeating that the other side is useless.

An opposing player may do something skilful while we wish the situation had gone differently. We can acknowledge the quality of that action without changing teams. “That was well done; now we need a good response” holds appreciation and loyalty in the same sentence. The contest becomes more interesting when we can recognise ability wherever it appears.

At Ishta Mel, our remembrance of Durga can support this generous strength. We seek the confidence to remain enthusiastic without needing to diminish someone else. Respect then becomes part of how we watch, woven into our ordinary reactions rather than saved for a formal statement after the excitement has passed.

A close decision tests our words

The atmosphere can change quickly when a decision goes against the team we support. We may feel certain that everyone should see the moment as we saw it. Yet from the sofa, we may have an incomplete view, and another supporter may interpret the same passage differently. Strong feeling can arrive before full understanding.

We can describe the moment rather than attack the people involved. “That looked different to me” leaves space to examine what happened. “They are all dishonest” turns uncertainty into an accusation and changes the gathering's tone. A disagreement about a particular decision need not become a judgement about the worth of a whole team or its supporters.

If the conversation becomes repetitive, returning attention to the next part of the match can help. We may still disagree, but we do not have to keep demanding surrender from the person beside us. The afternoon contains more than one disputed moment. Choosing to watch again allows the shared activity to continue without requiring everyone to have an identical opinion.

When the joke stops being shared

Friendly teasing depends on the people receiving it being able to enjoy and answer it. A joke about a dramatic reaction may be welcome among friends; repeated remarks about someone's background, appearance or family can quickly make the room uncomfortable. The label “only joking” does not tell us whether the exchange is still mutual. We need to notice the actual person.

Our 9IPL reflection asks for courage when the group begins to reward an unkind line. We can redirect without turning the correction into a public performance: “Let us keep it about the match,” or “Come on, give them room to support their side.” A short sentence can make another way of participating available. We can then model that way through our next comment.

If our own remark lands badly, we can acknowledge it directly and stop repeating it. Explaining at length that we meant no harm may leave the other person having to comfort us. A simple recognition of the effect, followed by more considerate speech, helps the gathering recover. The important change is in what we do next.

Children learn the shape of support

A child watching with us notices more than the score. They hear whether losing a moment gives adults permission to insult, whether an opposing supporter can speak and whether skill receives appreciation. We do not need to turn the match into a continuous lesson. Our ordinary reactions already show a way of caring about something in the presence of other people.

We can invite the child to notice a useful action rather than ask only who is winning. We can also let them choose a different team without treating the choice as disloyalty to the family. This gives enthusiasm room to be personal. A shared gathering can contain different hopes and still offer the pleasure of watching together.

The final score leaves people in the room

When the match ends, the people beside us are still our friends, neighbours or relatives. If our side has done well, we can enjoy the result without pressing another supporter to perform disappointment for our amusement. If we are disappointed, we can acknowledge that feeling without making the successful side's supporters responsible for carrying it.

For us, 9IPL opens a reflection on loyalty that can remain wholehearted and hospitable. With Durga in our thoughts, we seek strength in our voice, fairness in our attention and restraint when excitement becomes sharp. The cups still need collecting, someone will discuss a memorable moment, and the friend in the other colours will leave through the same door. We can send them home glad that they watched with us.